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Girl : When you think of me, What do u do ?
Boy : I eat your favourite Ice-Crram !! & What about U ?
Girl : I drink King Fisher Strong !! :))))))))
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Half Glass : a Negative Person Sees d Glass of Water Half Empty. a Positive Person Sees it Half Full. But a Realistic Person adds 60ML & says CHEERS !!!
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Bhagwan Se Naseeb Mangna, Dimag Nahi; Kyu ki Maine Bade Bade Dimag-walo ko Nasib-walo k yaha Kam Karte Dekha Hai ...
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Teacher: Bade ho kar tum kya karoge? Student: Ji shaadi. Teacher: Mera matalab, kya banoge? Student: Ji dulha. Teacher: Are, mera matlab hai, kya hasil karoge? Student: Ji DULHAN.
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Friendship is not about finding similarities, it is about respecting differences. You are not my friend coz you are like me, but because i accept you and respect you the way you are.
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A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
Santa doesn’t turns up for 4 days.
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
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Once Santa Singh, the psychiatrist, met a friend and exclaimed, "I heard you are dead."
But you see I'm alive, smiled the friend.
Impossible, said Santa Singh. The man who told me is much more reliable than you.
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How long does it take to fly to Amritsar?
Just a sec, comes an answer.
Thank you says the Sardarji and hangs up!
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A teacher asked Pappu: What's the capital of United States?
Pappu: Washington DC.
When asked what "DC" stood for, Pappu added, "Dot com!"
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teri dosti apun ko itnee pasan hai jaise
'Ulloo ko raat'
'gadhe ko laat'
'dentist ko daant' aur
raja ko gaddi
kutte ko haddi
& nange ko chaddi
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Question : When do you CONGRATULATE someone for their MISTAKE.
Answer : On their MARRIAGE.
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What is the difference between a woman and a magnet?
A: Magnets have a positive side!
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What's the diff between mother & wife?
A: One woman brings into the world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so.
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Why dogs don't marry?
A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!
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There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go thru hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.
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A beggar walks up to a well-dressed woman & said, "I haven't eaten anything in four days."
She looked at him & said, "God, I wish I had your willpower."
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Guide: I welcome u all to the Niagra falls. These are the world's largest waterfalls & the sound intensity of the waterfall is so high, sound of even 20 supersonic planes passing can't b heard! Now may I request the ladies to keep quiet so that we can hear the Niagra Falls??
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Wife's definition of retirement: Twice as much husband on half as much pay.
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A husband, the owner of a new car, was somewhat reluctant to allow his wife to drove his prize possession...even to the grocery store which was a few blocks from the house.
After she insisted, he finally relented, cautioning her as she departed, "Remember, if you have an accident, the newspaper will print your age!"
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It's a fact: A girl may not help u to get lot of salary but... salary may help u to get lot of girls. So, love your work not girls!
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After robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk: Did u see me robbing?
Clerk: Yes.
Robber shot him dead & asked d next clerk: Did u?
2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!
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Wife: I Have Changed My Mind.
Husband: Thank God ! Does The New One Work Now?
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Maths & Women are the two most complicated things in this world...
But maths at least has some logic!
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Why women live a better, longer & a peaceful life?
Because, women don't have a wife.
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Q: What's the difference between a policeman's knightstick and a magician's wand?
A: A Magician's wand is for cunning stunts.
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